Missouri state attorney general Jay Nixon has brought suit against the company behind the "Miss Cleo" psychic hotline, claiming that the company committed fraud and other illegal business practices.

The basis of the Missouri suit has something to do with a liberal use of the word "free" to mean $4.99 per minute. But Miss Cleo counters that each reading is suffixed with a prediction that the caller was "going to see a really big charge on their next credit card statement" and it comes true every time.

"Miss Cleo said it was a free readin', but honey child no," said Nixon at a recent press conference [which he attended in a brightly-colored dress, dew rag, and dangly earings]. "They just used the first 'free' three minutes to get my name and credit card number. That Miss Cleo is one crafty psychic."

Some have wondered aloud why the attorney general for a state ravaged by violent drug crime would fritter away his budget going after a seemingly harmless cult figure.

A highly-publicized lawsuit brought by a camera-loving state attorney general, an office generally accepted as the gubernatorial "on deck circle"- it just doesn't add up. The people of Missouri continue to scratch their heads.

Anticipating the obligatory news coverage, Nixon beat the hack editorialists to the punch, saying that Miss Cleo couldn't be truly psychic because she "didn't see it coming."

But it seems that Miss Cleo may have known about it for some time. In the latest spate of TV spots which began airing last week, Miss Cleo appears with her lawyer who, coincidentally, also speaks with a marginal Caribbean accent and, yes, is also psychic.

"Obviously, these folks are not real psychics," said Nixon. "But just to be fair, we had some of our people call Miss Cleo to make sure. As we expected, it was all bunk."

Two women in Nixon's office called the hotline and were both told they were either pregnant or soon would be. Each one was told they had an old lover who would soon come back into their lives and then suddenly come into a great deal of money.

Nixon claims that the company's slogan "Keepin' It Real" constitutes a form of false advertising. "Miss Cleo certainly did not keep it real," said Nixon. "She seemed to know that I was a public official of some kind. But when she guessed 'dog catcher', we knew we had her."

In her defense, Miss Cleo told reporters that Nixon has no proof that the psychic advice she and her cohorts provided was incorrect. "Whoo! That Jay Nixon thinks his wife is cheatin' on him. He is right! When I tell him this, he isn't very happy, says that I am not a psychic. I tell him to go ask his wife if I am a psychic or not. Whoo!"